If you feel stuck in unhappiness, there’s a high probability you might be lying to yourself. Living in Dallas you’ve heard the phrase “The Devil is a lie”. Well this lying devil could be you! The scariest part of it all is that the person you might be lying to the most also might just be you! My FAB friend, before you decide to exit, stick with me. I know you don’t try to purposefully lie to yourself, you are way to FAB to just sit around and lie! But, sometimes we are conditioned to supress our thoughts/feelings. Sometimes we’ve been taught that our dreams are worthless. Sometimes we’ve been shown that people who look like you can’t do what you want to do. Sometimes we gave up. Sometimes we’ve been abused or hurt and conditioned to not try. All of this conditioning and supression can easily lead the average person into becoming an unknowing liar. Here are 3 signs you’re lying to yourself:
1. Not doing what you LOVE and making excuses why you can’t- Are you really doing what you love? What do you love anyway? How often do you get to do what you love? Here’s an exercise for you! Make a list of 20 different things you love. Next to the things you love, write down the date of the last time you did those things. Now for anything over 2 years ask yourself why you haven’t done it. Now let’s evaluate. Listen to what you are saying. Are you making excuses for not doing the things you love. Are you doing things you really hate instead of what you love? If you answered yes, then you are lying to yourself. You are making excuses. To alleviate this lie, you have to tell the truth. Let’s say you haven’t been on vacation in 5 years. So your excuse may be that you don’t have the money/vacation time/energy. But deep down inside this is what you want. I’ve heard this scenario so many times. The reality is the person isn’t willing to change. They have the ability to save, they have the ability to get another job, they have the ability to do what they want to do, but they are choosing to do differently. The truth might be they feel guilty, or undeserving. The real lie is they don’t believe in themselves, even in this simple situation. They aren’t willing to put in work to get what they want. They aren’t believing they can have something so they lie to themselves with logical excuses. This puts them on the path to unhappiness. You must find the way to do what you love, often. Everytime you do something you love, you venture off the unhappiness path and land on the path to joy.
2. Indecisiveness- Are you unsure about things? Are you unable to make decisions? Are you unclear about your itentions? Are you unsure of what direction to go? This one is a big FAB deal! You have to be CERTAIN in life. The first thing in uncovering this lie is to ask yourself who are you? On a piece of paper write down who you are. Describe your character, your likes, your dislikes. Only mention your role in other people’s lives, don’t mention their lives. This is all about you. Once you know who you are, it’s easier to make decisions. If you’ve been lying to yourself about who you are, of course you’ll be indecisve. Now let’s think about the decisions you have to make. Which one lines up most with who you want to be? Tap into your good qualities, the things that already make you happy, overcome your fears, and make a decision. This puts you much closer to personal happiness.If you don’t know who you are, and are really unsure. Don’t feel bad. Now is the time to DISCOVER! Try all sorts of new things. You’ll quickly figure out what you like and what you love, and you’ll discover who you are!!! Once you discover who you are, decision making will be easy. When you figure out who you are, you’ll quickly stop lying to yourself! This is the path to personal freedom!
3. No goals- Why don’t you have goals? Yes, by not having goals this is an indication you are lying to yourself. When you love yourself, you set goals for yourself. If you aren’t setting goals, if you are avoiding this self loving act, then you’re hurting yourself. Deep down inside you don’t value yourself enough to do the right thing. Avoiding is lying to! By avoiding the time it takes to set goals, you are lying to yourself about what you want in life. When you don’t acknowledge what you want, you are lying by omission. If you really want something, you have to be direct. State exactly what you want! Focus on how you are going to get there and SET YOUR GOALS. Setting goals leads directly to the path of success.
What do you love, what do you want to do, and what are your goals to get there? These are the 3 simple TRUTHS you must embrace to overcome lying to yourself. Live FREE and FAB!